Posted in mummy baby love, pregnancy, Uncategorized

Anxious second time expecting mum

screenshot_2017-01-12-22-34-00-1I always mention in most of my posts. Time flies. I still remember the day when z was born. Now she is 15 months walking and talking. Getting independent day by day. Doesn’t know that after 6 months her new baby sibling will join too.

Today I had my first scan. And the feelings I had this time is same as I had with Z. It’s so strange of how much love I have in my heart for my second one already. It’s unbelievable. I used to think it must be hard for mums to love all the kids likewise. Now I experienced how true it is that God put so much love in your heart when you become a mum.

With all this love and excitement, I have some concerns as well.

How I am gonna give attention to both??

How they both gonna sleep? (Sharing house with parents. Both kids gonna sleep in one room)

What If my toddler feel jealous or think I am a bad mum?

How much laundry I will be doing?

Will I become a boogie woman? Who stink of dribble and vomits..

How on earth women with kids get time to do all the make up with fake lashes on as well?

Would I be able to sleep?

Am I being overly conscious?

I’m not very good at handling too many things together and I looked after my first one the perfect way. The time she sleeps is the time no body is allowed to make noise. Her nap time and meal times are fixed. She has proper routine. How do second time mums make routine in circumstances like mine. When u have to share room with both of your kids.

I hope my worries will go in few months or these are just my hormones that making me anxious.

Please leave your feedback and let me know if someone is in the same boat.

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Posted in mummy baby love

How much love is too much?

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There is nothing more important to me when it comes to my daughter.  I love her so much to the extent people telling me that I need to slow  down. After having my daughter I realised the worth of my own mother . The problems and all the struggle she faced raising me and giving me the best she could. The same feeling have for my daughter.

The best thing I have in my life right now is my baby. It took me 3 years to conceive her. I have been trying to conceive since 3 years. It was a struggle.  Me and my husband both wanted to have a kid since we got married. We had ups and downs in our relationship but he was always very supportive. She came in my life like a light in a dark.

I used to work part time. But now,I don’t want to go back.  I just can’t leave my princess. They say I’m paranoid. I want them to know I’m a mother.  What I feel for her is something indescribable. The words don’t fulfill the meanings. The first thing in the morning when she coos in her moses basket and smile to see my face. When I pick her up that’s our moment.  When she look into my eyes and the spark she gets in her eyes. Like I’m her whole world. Soon there will be a day when she call me , mama! Let me do it myself.  I will be so proud.

There’s nothing in the world like this love. If loving my child and me being there all the time for her is too much. Then I say, I love her too much ! She is my whole world and the comfort of my eyes.